How to Save a Life
by Pumpkin Sage
Summary: When Zexion is assigned to an impossible suicide mission, Demyx just wants to say goodbye; or does he mean to say more than that? Their goodbyes don't amount to the realizations that come to them both when Zexion goes missing during the mission, and the two soon learn that wishing on stars isn't always what it takes to save a life. - Zemyx - Zexion x Demyx
1. an attempt at goodbye

**How to Save a Life**

_- When Zexion is assigned to an impossible suicide mission, Demyx just wants to say goodbye._

Disclaimer: I do not own Kingdom Hearts.

0-0-0-0-0

It wasn't the mission that made Demyx worry so much; it was the Nobody that it had been assigned to.

The sky was always dark in the World That Never Was, but according to the blue alarm clock sitting on Demyx's nightstand, it was the exact color that it should be: pitch. It was 11:30 p.m. and, in exactly seven hours, Zexion would be sent out and more than likely die. When it came to Nobodies such as themselves, 'die' was the equivalent of 'disappear' or 'fade back into darkness forever'.

It made Demyx sick to think of such a thing happening to Zexion.

Many of the other Organization members had noticed the growing fondness Demyx appeared to have for Number VI and were constantly either chiding or teasing the two about it, even if the 'feeling' wasn't mutual for Zexion. Many times in the past, if the nocturne had happened to wonder into Zexion's room 'on accident' or 'accidentally' stumble into him in the hallways, it was met with a series of ill-meant remarks and inquiries as to why he insisted on doing such things all the time. Up to this point, Demyx's reply had always been the same, "Wha-oh, I'm sorry, Zexion! I didn't mean to, I was just…" and then he would come up with a random excuse and hurry off, secretly pleased and smiling to himself with and about the small bit of conversation he had managed to have with the Cloaked Schemer. In truth, he wasn't quite sure of what the reason was himself.

Some called it love, and some called it idiocy. No one had dared say this to Zexion yet, in fear he might make their lives miserable with his illusions and countless schemes, though the idea that Demyx might tell him in some form or fashion was becoming quite popular amongst everyone else, and now, Demyx was up late considering it himself.

But how do you tell someone who was about to go out and die something like that?

xxx

_Tap, tap, tap_

Three small knocks on his door was what brought Number VI away from his thoughts.

_Oh, what is it now…?_

Zexion sighed and warily approached the door, setting his lexicon beside him on the bed before he did so. "Who is this, and what may I do for you?" he asked, setting a gloved hand on the knob but not yet turning it.

"Err, Zexion? It's me, Demyx."

Zexion's eyebrows furrowed together as he tried to think of a reason as to why Demyx was disturbing him at this hour. "Number IX, I don't have time for your games," he chided, more than a bit irritated at the Nobody standing outside his door.

"Please, Zexion? I really need to talk to you."

Zexion sighed, contemplating his options and wondering what might happen if he opened the door for the nocturne at such a late hour in the night. He didn't want Demyx to get upset and start begging to come in, which would no doubt strike amusement among any of the other members that heard, but he had enough on his mind as it was and still had yet to prepare for his mission tomorrow. So whenever he at last responded, Zexion surprised himself with his own words.

"Fine," he muttered, opening the door and allowing Demyx to quickly step by him and into the room. "But I don't have all night." _And presumably not tomorrow. _

Demyx nodded from where he stood in the middle of the floor, quietly watching Zexion close the door to his room back after inspecting the hallway to see if any of the other members had witnessed the conversation. "Now," the tactician turned towards the other warily. "What is it that you need to talk to me about?"

"Well," Demyx began, glancing around the room nervously for some form of distraction. "I was…err, I needed, I mean, _wanted _to give you this." He pulled a CD out from his pocket and extended it out towards Zexion, who hesitantly accepted it. He watched as the shorter man inspected it curiously and gulped.

"It's a song I thought you might like, is all," Demyx explained, a bit too quickly for no suspicion to be held at all.

With a sigh, Zexion walked over to his desk and placed the CD beside a stack of papers. "Thank you, Number IX," he began. "But you know as well as I do that I probably won't have a use for it by tomorrow." He resisted the urge to frown at the thought and glanced over at Demyx with as little graveness as he could muster. To Zexion's surprise, the nocturne looked to be as deeply upset as he was, and yet was making no attempt to hide it.

"I know, but I thought you could listen to it while you set up your panels, at least for tonight," Demyx offered glumly, making no attempt whatsoever to mask his sadness. He pointed over to the open lexicon laying on the bed, emphasizing his statement.

"Ah, well, I suppose you're right; I haven't finished preparing yet," Zexion mumbled, suddenly wanting to avoid all eye contact with Demyx as possible. "I believe I will, Number IX. Thank you."

"You're welcome," the nocturne replied, more than just a hint of misery in his voice. Zexion blinked, startled at how the emotion across the other's face looked almost…well, almost _real. _But it was impossible for them as Nobodies to feel. This was just another one of Demyx's games, he told himself uncertainly.

The two stood still for a several moments, glancing awkwardly at the other as the seconds ticked by into minutes that were beginning to feel like hours. An unfamiliar warmth crept up into Zexion's face, and he noticed Demyx's own face was beginning to turn oddly…red.

"Are you…blushing?!" Zexion sputtered out, staring at the other in shock. Demyx's face only darkened in color, and he quickly covered his face with his hands.

"You are, too, you know," the other pointed out sheepishly, peeking out from behind his fingers, and the temperature in the room seemed to rise by several degrees for Zexion.

"Alright, Demy-Number IX," Zexion began, his voice shaky, and Demyx seemed to muster enough courage to drop his hands. "I think it's time you left and proceeded back to your own room. I don't care what you do in there, but _please _leave me to my preparations in quiet and in solitude."

"I…" Demyx looked down at the ground, looking slightly put-out. "Alright. Goodnight, Zexion." He gave an awkward wave and slowly proceeded to the door, leaving a trail of misery behind him. Zexion wasn't relaxed until the door closed and the footsteps trailing down the hall belonging to Demyx were no longer audible.

xxx

"Now, what could he have meant by this?"

The Cloaked Schemer picked up the CD Demyx had given him and stared at it blankly. He had many mixed thoughts on this, most of scrutiny, embarrassment, and uncertainty, but most importantly, the thought of _why_. It wasn't as if Demyx and he could actually be considered _friends, _even if Number IX did think that they were, for whatever reason. At the most, Zexion considered the CD to be a parting gift, since the mission he had been assigned to for tomorrow was deemed to be fairly impossible.

_Maybe I_ could _listen to it… for a moment, at the very least. _

He dug through one of the drawers of his desk and found a mini-CD player, one that had headphones attached and a very low volume, before inserting the disk in and carrying the small device over to his bed.

It might give me a slightly clearer conscious for the afterlife, if nothing else.

The CD had no label, so Zexion could only guess two things about it: one, that it was copied or pirated, and two, that it might be one of Demyx's tapes of himself singing loud and _very _off-key.

Hesitantly, he pushed the on-button and began to let it play, staying still for a moment before he was sure it wasn't Demyx's singing. The song started out with piano keys playing softly, before a man Zexion had never heard before starting singing lyrics he wasn't familiar with himself. It wasn't off-key or some sort of rock band with irritatingly loud screaming, so he shrugged and allowed it to continue playing before going about sorting through panels and hi-potions for his mission tomorrow.

And, to Zexion's surprise, he really did enjoy the song.

_Step one: you say, "We need to talk."_

_he walks; you say, "Sit down, it's just a talk."_

_he smiles politely back at you_

_you stare politely right on through._

_Some sort of window to your right_

_As he goes left and you stay_

_Right between the lines of fear and blame._

_You begin to wonder why you came._

_Where did I go wrong?_

_I lost a friend, somewhere along in the bitterness._

_And I would have stayed up with you all night,_

_Had I known how to save a life._

_Let him know that you know best,_

_'cause after all, you do know best._

_Try to step past his defense, without granting innocence._

_Lay down a list of what is wrong,_

_the things you told him all along._

_Pray to God he hears you,_

_and I pray to God he hears you._

_And where did I go wrong?_

_I lost a friend, somewhere along in the bitterness._

_And I would have stayed up with you all night,_

_Had I known how to save a life._

_As he begins to raise his voice,_

_You lower yours, and grant him one last choice._

_Drive until you lose the road,_

_or break with the ones you follow._

_He will do one of two things._

_He will admit to everything_

_Or he'll say he's just not the same,_

_And you'll begin to wonder why you came._

_Where did I go wrong?_

_I lost a friend, somewhere along in the bitterness._

_And I would have stayed up with you all night,_

_Had I known how to save a life._

_Where did I go wrong?_

_I lost a friend, somewhere along in the bitterness._

_And I would have stayed up with you all night,_

_Had I known how to save a life._

_How to save a life…_

_How to save a life…_

_Where did I go wrong?_

_I lost a friend, somewhere along in the bitterness._

_And I would have stayed up with you all night,_

_Had I known how to save a life._

_Where did I go wrong?_

_I lost a friend, somewhere along in the bitterness._

_And I would have stayed up with you all night,_

_Had I known how to save a life._

_How to save a life…_

_How to save a life…_

When it ended, Zexion felt like he were frozen. His hands at long since left the panel case of his lexicon, and he at last lay back on his bed, staring at the ceiling with blue eyes narrowed in concentration at what all of this meant.

When early morning came, and Saix arrived at his bedroom door ordering that he leave now, there was only one thought on Zexion's mind, and the fear he hadn't felt upon receiving the suicide mission filled his chest in a sudden burst of pain and guilt.

_Why didn't I tell Demyx goodbye?_

0-0-0-0-0

Author's Note: I am seriously considering turning this into a multi-chapter. What do you all think? And yes, this is meant to be a platonic relationship, but you can take this however you want. Some of you *coughnekolemonwritercough* are relentless, anyways, so enjoy this yaio or slash or platonic fic or whatever you want to call it, and don't forget to review!


	2. best friend

**How to Save a Life**

Disclaimer: I do not own Kingdom Hearts.

_- Just a special thanks to all of my lovely reviewers and readers out there. You guys rock! *thumbs up*_

0-0-0-0-0

An entire month went by without any word from or about Zexion.

For Demyx, it was the loneliest month he remembered ever having to endure as a Nobody. Not only did he feel as though he had lost a friend, but perhaps the tactician was what caused a large portion of the actions that occupied his day. Loneliness and the occasional mission were Demyx's only company now, besides when Axel, Roxas, and Xion had time to hang out, but even then, it just wasn't the same as when he tried to engage conversation with Zexion.

Maybe it was because everyone else had gotten used to Demyx or were simply tired of his antics and had given up on avoiding him that made him so fond of Zexion, who hadn't gotten used to him at all. All of the other members were too, well, _easy _to associate with, while the Cloaked Schemer had always been more of a challenge. Huh. Funny; up until that point, Demyx never would have thought of himself as a lover of challenges.

Maybe whenever he had been a Somebody, he'd enjoyed puzzles and games with a sort of twist or turn to them. As far as Demyx was concerned, his biggest fault as a Nobody was failing to complete the simplest of tasks. A challenging task _now _would be too much for him, he already knew, unless, by chance, he happened to enjoy or love it…

Of course, he didn't _love _Zexion; he was just drawn to the challenge and the puzzle that made the hard-to-associate-with Cloaked Schemer so appealing to him.

The day he figured all of this out, Demyx knew right away who he would always call his best friend.

0-0-0-0-0

Sighing, the nocturne laid his head back on the right arm of the couch and stared up at the ceiling, silently hoping a shooting star would shoot through the roof and grant him any wish he wanted. He would probably wish for Zexion's swift and safe return, if nothing else. None of the other members seemed to be bothered by the absence of the shorter man except for himself, but even if they didn't care, Demyx certainly did. His sanity was beginning to depend on it.

The white walls of the castle drilled holes into his mind, leaving him blank and wide-eyed through the largest portion of the day, his missions and other daily assignments. When he was dismissed to his room for the night, however, he could think clearly again, even if it was only for an hour or two before he drifted off into sleep. Maybe this was why the other members were so content with just being an empty nonexistence; it was hard to concentrate with the brightness of white and ordering voices weighing you down.

The darkness helped to spark his mind again, and the light only seemed to dig a canyon inside. Was that why Nobodies were considered to be beings of darkness? Demyx didn't know. He only knew that he missed Zexion more and more each day, and that however many nights and wishes he had to waste to get him back, he would do it.

0-0-0-0-0

Author's Note: _Short chapter? What is this madness? _Heehee, well, I figure this will be the only chance in the story to get out all the thoughts and things running through Demyx's mind right now (which means the next chapter will be Zexion's). This saves me unnecessary sap later, and so I won't have to have them make huge speeches or anything. And the reason I'm putting it into two chapters? Eh, makes the story longer. And honestly, I'm still considering what Zexion should think. Anyways, thanks to all of my reviewers, and please leave me a review!


End file.
